Are you sure you want to remove your connection to Nick Shepherd

That's what facebook asked me when I went to unfriend Nick. It was such a painful and unnecessarily confrontational question. Anyway, I couldn't handle my news feed anymore. The pictures from Vegas are going up. I can't tell which ones he's rolling in, but the alcohol is fairly obvious. I'm so sad. I'm so so sad. I suppose the time to get out of a relationship with an addict, or an immature douche (I'm not honestly sure which one he is) is when you first realize it, but I just hoped so hard that it wouldn't play out like this. It's so weird to try and navigate the logistics of breaking up with someone you lived with. He wants the apartment and I'm inclined to let him have it simply because I don't really want to live alone and I don't want to pay rent by myself. I don't know. It's all so full of suck. I'm really glad that my family lives so close and I'm really glad that I have a job that I love. I wish more of my friends were here. The four year old just called me and asked if I was coming in today. I told him that I didn't feel well (the truth) and that I didn't want to make him sick (also true but completely irrelevant to this particular situation). He then told me he was mad at me and gave the phone to his mom. It was completely adorable. And I look freaking awesome. For whatever reason the grief process makes my eyes pop and my skin looks amazing. I'm hoping that the looking fabulous and enjoying my day to day life will make things easier. It is super weird to be in the apartment without him though. My friend Rachel came and spend the night with me last night, which was really nice. I'm rambling. I'm sorry. I just wanted you guys to know. I miss you and I love you all so very much.